This is not an easy story to share, not because it is hard for me to share it, but because it is (sometimes) hard for people to hear it . . .
. . . but I think it's important to talk about these things, so here it is.
I launched my business a year after my husband and I suffered a devastating loss.
It took us a LONG time to get pregnant. (In fact, after over a year of trying, we looked into getting tested and treated for infertility and had decided that it wasn't the right choice for us.) We accepted what was. A little over a year later, we were surprised—and thrilled—to discover that I was pregnant. YIPPEE!!!
I was 36, and I knew that was OLD in terms of pregnancy—even though it isn't old at all in real life. I was cautiously optimistic, because I didn't have any real reasons to believe that there would be any issues. All my prenatal visits went well, my OB-GYN didn't have any concerns.
But then, when I went for my second trimester ultrasound, the tech saw something that did concern her.
I have an incompetent cervix. I was rushed by ambulance to another hospital where an emergency cervical cerclage was performed. When they sent me home they told me to take it easy.
I saw my OB-GYN a few days later and she told me that I needed to be on bed rest, and that I should get a wheelchair for times when I needed to leave the house. This was serious business.
I was scheduled for another ultrasound the following week, and as I was getting out of the car my water broke. My husband took me straight to the ER—we skipped going to the imaging clinic—and I was again rushed by ambulance to the other hospital to be admitted into their maternity ward so they could put me on IV antibiotics, and monitor me and the baby for the remainder of my pregnancy.
A week later, when the nurse came to check the baby's heartbeat it was too fast. After a few hours of monitoring, it had not slowed down, and while the neonatal team was deciding how to proceed it suddenly stopped. They rushed me into an emergency C-section, but unfortunately they were unable to save my daughter.
River was born on April 8, 2012, Easter Sunday.
My husband and I were both changed by the experience. We had a new appreciation for living in the present, because you never know what the future might hold.
Life is short, and you can't put off following your passions.
I realized that I didn't want to spend my life working for a faceless corporation while squashing my own dreams.
I wanted the work I do to be meaningful and purposeful AND aligned with my values. I wanted to feel fulfilled and like I was making an impact.
I didn't want to live to work anymore, I wanted to work in a way that would support me living the life of my choosing.
I wanted FREEDOM.
So, I started my own business. I get to choose what projects I work on, and the people I work with. And, I get to do whatever I want whenever I want to do it, because at the end of the day I only get one life and I need to live it the way I want to, and THAT is my WHY.